Baby Number TWO!! — Good For The Swole

I can finally say publicly that I’M PREGNANT AGAIN!!!! Thank the heavens! I can keep anyone’s secret for as long as they want, but when it’s my own, I’m completely useless. I waited a month after finding out, and that was hard enough haha.

Why I Decided To Start Sharing So Early

I know the standard approach to pregnancy is to keep it on the DL until you’re out of the first trimester, but I decided to share it a little bit earlier than most for a few reasons. First, I felt like a big, fat liar on social media. I not into sharing workouts I’m not actually doing. Or posting pictures of food that I’m not actually eating. I don’t like that. I try to be open and honest about everything and that’s hard to do when you’re super sick, and trying to pretend you’re not growing something in your stomach. Second, and really the main reason, is I wanted to be able to share my first trimester experience while I was going through it, as well as the second and third trimesters. I feel like the first trimester isn’t talked about a whole lot, because we mostly keep it on the down low. I know I struggled A LOT during the first trimester with Piper because I was throwing up multiple times every day, I had zero energy, and everything was so new and worrisome. I hope by sharing some of the things I’m going through/doing this time to stay sane are helpful to other women going through this horrible phase. And lastly, if I do happen to miscarry during this sensitive time (which is unfortunately part of the conceiving process), I knew I would mention it, even if I hadn’t announced I was pregnant yet, and share whatever I was comfortable with. So why not share that I’m pregnant anyway? I feel like I have no right to talk much about miscarriage, because I haven’t yet experienced it first hand, and it is such a delicate, heartbreaking matter, but it is common and could absolutely still happen.

Getting Pregnant Again

I have been baby hungry since Piper was placed in my arms in the delivery room. I LOVE babies and kids and I want at least 7 of my own (I’m not joking here). I was ready to get pregnant again at 3 months haha, but Jordan was nooooot, so we didn’t talk very seriously about it until Pipes was 7 months old. He was ready to stop using contraception, and see what happened, so I took that as, “yes, let’s have a baby!!” and ran with it.

I was exclusively nursing Piper still, and she ate a toooon (eh, have you seen her belly??), so I was still nursing her very frequently and my period hadn’t come back yet. It varies for every women, and usually comes back between 6-18 months (if you’re breastfeeding), so I tried not to freak out (not an easy thing for me to do) and just let me body just do it’s thing. My goal was to nurse Piper for at least 9 months (ideally for a year though)…buuuut when I got to 9 months, my body still hadn’t started ovulating. We really wanted our babies to be close in age, so after a lOT of consideration, I started weaning right before she turned 9 months. It sounds so overly dramatic now as I’m typing it out haha, but breastfeeding is so special to me, and to stop that was extremely hard. **Just to clarify, you CAN ovulate and get pregnant before your period comes back after delivery, but *my* body hadn’t started ovulating yet.

Piper was done nursing at exactly 9 months postpartum (insert all the crying face emojis), and my period came back (I’ve truly never been so overjoyed to have a period) at exactly 10 months postpartum. A couple of weeks later, I took a pregnancy test because I was feeling a few of the symptoms, but also wasn’t sure if my period was about to start, since I figured it wasn’t on a proper cycle yet. Jordan went to the store for a few other things, and I casually asked him to pick up a test. I took it as soon as he got home, and immediately a very bold “plus” sign popped up! Because I only had one period postpartum, we won't be 100% sure how far along I am until I get the first ultrasound. I had my HCG blood levels tested a week ago, and from that it looks like I'm about 8 weeks pregnant!

A big part of me feels incredibly guilty for being able to quickly get pregnant again. I feel so undeserving and I can't help but think of how many couples struggle with infertility or miscarriages, and how for others it happens so easily, or even unexpectedly. It doesn’t seem fair. I’m not sure why it’s like that, but I try to never take pregnancy for granted, as hard as it is sometimes/most of the time. I am so grateful and humbled to be able to carry a baby again.

Well I’ve most likely hit the max amount of words you’re allowed to have in a post at this point! Excuse me while I go throw up for the one hundreth time today.